The release is intense
Now that I’ve created distance between Loren and I, I have the space to see what’s really up. I end up in some strange dissociated state every time I see him-some more intense than others-that I can only identify because I have new experiences I can make comparisons from. Healing is a trip. I wanna go away.
I cried so hard yesterday that my nose is raw and my eyes are fucked
Rice and beans and chicken, waves of sadness, in n out, yes and no, being sleepy, being serene, feeling things, shifting focus, shifty eyes, unwanted attention, unwavering disbelief, shoulda coulda woulda I’m sure, less yes’s more no’s
I think I might be feelin too much bud
Too much room for speculation is not compatible with delusional tendencies
Okay maybe I should go to therapy
I just want a bigger home.
Wholesome, some holes
Every day, all day, I thank god for you.
Every moment, every memory, everything was worth it because I got you.
I promise to always try
It’s all fun and games til you accidentally fall asleep, dream somethin’ sweet, and wake up even deeper in it