As it is after any huge transition- these moments are crucial. The choices I make now will solidify into habits and routines, so I am mindful. Caring but not too careful. Absolutely focused on who I want to be. Showing love to who I am. As I watch you watch me- I am in love. I am in love with you and with this new me. Reciprocity. You stare up at me in awe as your mind soaks in every bit, turning my reality into a lesson for you. I will make it loving, tender, honest. I would do anything for you so I must, for me too.
My planner is full and most everything has a line through it. God damnit! We are doing it!
I feel fresh, I feel.
The weight of my obligations is a joyful embrace. I long to be myself, wherever that is. I feel no dread about dishes or mopping. Laundry doesn’t push me to procrastinate. I am not avoiding life anymore. I choose to be an active participant, fully and presently and here. I choose. This is where I want to be, exactly who we are.