Last night we held a yoga workshop at The Cosmic Cauldron. I practice every day but I have no guidance or knowledge truly. I enjoyed it so much! I may be sold on actually attending classes.
I ache for closeness. I long for belonging. I don’t need to fit in, but I’d like to fit somewhere. Near, together, community. I need feminine connection. The lay-around-talking, the “hey-are-you-home-I’m-coming-over,” the “tell-me-everything” kind of friendship. I haven’t had it in years. I regret nothing in an honest way, there is nothing I would change- but I notice some trends of my existence. I unintentionally fell into the got-a-man-leaves-friends-behind category, and while it was enthralling at first, I have accepted that a romantic relationship can not fulfill anyone completely. So now I have everything I could want when it comes to my family but I still feel the space. The void that only a friend could fill.
How do we meet new people? How do we let our walls down long enough to find the right fit? I don’t know.
All I am sure of is that I need to do more getting out of my comfort zone, putting myself out there, and opening. Opening up. Full throat exposure, arms wide open, take it or leave it. I think there is something to be said for living that way in general.
here, now. i want it and so it is mine.
so it is.